Socially ADDept: Teaching Social Skills to Children with ADHD, LD, and Asperger's

Decodes the often confusing rules of social behaviour for all children.

Socially ADDept helps educators and parents teach the hidden rules of social behaviour to children with limited social skills, notably those with special needs like ADHD, learning disabilities, Asperger's and high-functioning autism, Tourette Syndrome, and nonverbal learning disabilities. The author provides all the information parents and professionals need to know to help kids learn social skills in simple, concise explanations. The book is divided into eight sections that educators can use as teaching units or parents can work through one week (or month) at a time.

• Includes a way for children to see themselves and how their behaviour looks to others
• Deciphers the complex rules of nonverbal language into friendly, bite-sized morsels that kids can understand
• Offers a field-tested collection of suggestions and strategies for parents and professionals who want to enhance a child's social competence
• Socially ADDept is presented in a hands-on workbook format, complete with reproducible student worksheets.

Table of Contents

About This Book.

About the Author.

Acknowledgments.

Introduction.

Part I: What Parents and Teachers Need to Know.

Chapter 1: Why Children with Special Needs Struggle Socially.

• Why Teach Social Skills?
• Language Difficulties and the Hidden Rules of Conversation.
• Difficulty Recognizing and Labeling Feelings.
• Poor Problem-Solving Skills.
• Failure to Mimic Behavior.
• How Children Deal with "Different" Behavior.
• Why Train Preadolescent Children?
• Two Major Weaknesses That Lead to Social Mistakes.
• Black-or-White Thinking.
• Teaching Children with SN the Behaviors of Popular Children.
• The Importance of Early Intervention.
• Teaching Joint Attention.
• Two Major Deficits.
• Ten Essential Skills for Being Socially ADDept.
• Notes.

Chapter 2: Tips for Communicating with Children.

• Coaching Children on Desirable Behaviors.
• Role-Playing the Right Way Versus the Wrong Way.
• Empathy: Being in the Other Person's Shoes.
• Using Humor.
• Observing and Dealing with Perseveration.
• Recess.
• Monitoring Play.
• Using Opportunistic Reinforcement.

Chapter 3: Setting Individual Goals and Giving Structured Feedback.

• Building Skills Teaches Resiliency.
• Helping Children Set Their Goals.
• Creating an Individual Program for Each Child.
• Using the Self-Evaluation Forms.
• Using the Self-Evaluation Form to Confirm Joint Perception.
• The Parent's Role as Facilitator.
• The Teacher's Role as Facilitator.
• Parents and Teachers Working Together.
• Rewarding Progress.
• Correcting Omissions or Inappropriate Behaviors.
• Self-Evaluation Form: Listening.
• Self-Evaluation Form: Showing Interest.
• Self-Evaluation Form: Paying Attention to Stop Signs.
• Self-Evaluation Form: Controlling Talking Too Much.
• Self-Evaluation Form: Being a Good Host.
• Charting Negative Behavior.
• Charting Positive Behavior.
• Notes.

Chapter 4: Ways Parents Can Help.

• Helping Your Child Find and Excel in an Activity.
• Preparing for Social Situations.
• Using Discipline During a Play Date.
• Preparing Children for New Situations.
• Teaching Manners.
• Building Physical Coordination.
• Helping Children Learn About Time.
• Using Humor Appropriately.
• Finding a Social Skills Group.
• Meeting Other Parents.
• Getting Help for Yourself.

Part II: The Socially ADDept Lessons.

Lesson One: Friendship Skills and Setting Goals.

• 1.1 What Makes a Friend?
• 1.2 What Do Friendly People Do?
• 1.3 Ten Friendship Skills.
• 1.4 Defining Personal Goals.
• 1.5 Defining Positive Qualities.
• 1.6 Identifying Children’s Special Interests.
• Exercise 1: What Do Friendly People Do?
• Exercise 2: Defining My Personal Goals.
• Exercise 3: Tooting Your Own Horn.
• Exercise 4: Private or Public Talk?
• Exercise 5: Identify Your Interests.
• Exercise 6: Friendship Cards: Keep a Record of Facts About Your Friends.
• Exercise 7: Good Host Rules.
• Exercise 8: Finding Neighborhood Activities: The Parent's Job.

Lesson Two: Being a Good Listener and Other Conversational Skills.

• 2.1 Listening.
• 2.2 Listening Mistakes.
• 2.3 The Body Language of Listening.
• 2.4 Elements of a Good Conversation: Listening and Responding.
• 2.5 Different Types of Questions.
• 2.6 Other Kinds of Responses.
• 2.7 How to Deal with Perseveration.
• 2.8 Arranging a STOP Sign.
• Exercise 9: Listening Facts.
• Exercise 10: Eye Contact.
• Exercise 11: It's Those Eyes!
• Exercise 12: Stopping When Asked.

Lesson Three: Verbal Conversational Skills.

• 3.1 Greetings.
• 3.2 Conversation Openers: Small Talk.
• 3.3 The Middle of the Conversation: Asking Questions and Making Comments.
• 3.4 Other Ways to Continue a Conversation.
• 3.5 Exiting a Conversation.
• 3.6 Conversation Mistakes.
• 3.7 The Four Kinds of Friendship and When to Share Feelings.
• 3.8 Off-Limits Topics.
• Exercise 13: Sharing the Airtime.
• Exercise 14: Listening and Adding to the Story.
• Exercise 15: TV Host.
• Exercise 16: Using the Telephone (for Children at Home).
• Exercise 17: How Do Boys Greet Each Other at Your School? How Do Girls Greet Each Other?
• Exercise 18: How Do Children Say Good-Bye to Each Other?

Lesson Four: Communicating Feelings Through Body Language.

• 4.1 Facial Expressions.
• 4.2 It’s Those Eyes.
• 4.3 Open or Closed Gestures and Posture.
• 4.4 Respecting Personal Space.
• 4.5 Touching People.
• 4.6 STOP Signs.
• Exercise 19: Facial Expressions.
• Exercise 20: Practice Identifying Feelings in Facial Expressions and Body Language.
• Exercise 21: Body Language.
• Exercise 22: Physical Proximity.

Lesson Five: Being "in Sync"—Understanding and Echoing Tone.

• 5.1 Using Music to Teach Emotional Harmony.
• 5.2 The Tone of Emotions.
• 5.3 When the Tone or Body Language Disagrees with the Spoken Words.
• Exercise 23: The Right Tone of Voice
• Exercise 24: Volume Control.
• Exercise 25: Practice Identifying How Feelings Sound.
• Exercise 26: Copy Cat: Practicing Being in Someone Else's Shoes.
• Note for Lesson Five.

Lesson Six: Recognizing Friendly Behavior.

• 6.1 Recognizing Friendly Behavior.
• 6.2 Review of STOP Signs.
• 6.3 Nonverbal STOP Signs.
• 6.4 Verbal STOP Signs.
• 6.5 Reading STOP Signs.
• 6.6 Play Red Light, Green Light.
• 6.7 Using Manners to Say STOP.
• Exercise 27: Reading Friendly and Unfriendly Body Language.
• Exercise 28: STOP Signs.
• Exercise 29: Recognizing How Other Children Say Good-Bye.

Lesson Seven: Joining an Ongoing Group.

• 7.1 Joining a Group.
• 7.2 Join, Don't Intrude.
• 7.3 Demonstrate the Wrong Way to Join a Group.
• 7.4 Demonstrate the Right Way to Join a Group.
• 7.5 Inclusion or Exclusion?
• 7.6 Rejection Versus Refusal.
• 7.7 Groups and Cliques.
• 7.8 When Your Child Cannot Join a Group (for Parents).
• Exercise 30: Practice Joining an Ongoing Group.
• Exercise 31: Defining the Groups at School.
• Note for Lesson Seven.

Lesson Eight: Dealing with Teasing.

• 8.1 Why Children Tease Others.
• 8.2 Three Major Types of Teasing.
• 8.3 Why Children Use Status Teasing (or Put-Down Humor).
• 8.4 Boys and Status Teasing.
• 8.5 Evaluating the Type of Teasing.
• 8.6 The Wrong Way to Handle Teasing.
• 8.7 Three Strategies to Handle Teasing.
• 8.8 Role-Play Being Teased.
• 8.9 When Jokes Aren't Funny: The Rules of Humor.
• 8.10 The Rule of Equals.
• Exercise 32: Figuring Out the Type of Teasing.
• Notes for Lesson Eight.

Lesson Nine: Managing Anger.

• 9.1 Why Do We Get Angry?
• 9.2 Why Should Children Control Their Anger?
• 9.3 The Hot-Tempered Child.
• 9.4 Identifying Physical Responses to Anger.
• 9.5 Identifying the Child’s Anger Style.
• 9.6 Identifying Anger Triggers.
• 9.7 Checking Out the Other Person's Intentions.
• 9.8 Handling Anger the Wrong Way.
• 9.9 Seven Steps to Process Anger.
• 9.10 Role-Play Handling Anger.
• 9.11 When There Is an Outburst.
• 9.12 Apologizing.
• Exercise 33: What Makes You Angry?
• Exercise 34: Handling Anger Differently.
• Exercise 35: Practice Apologizing.

Lesson Ten: Children in Cyberspace: Old Rules, New Rules.

• 10.1 Cell Phone Etiquette and Rules.
• 10.2 Rules About Internet Use.
• 10.3 Cyber-Bullying.
• Exercise 36: Watch "Kids Online".

Conclusion: Learning Social Skills Is a Lifelong Process.

Part III: Appendices.

• Appendix A: What Is ADHD?
• Appendix B: What Are Learning Disabilities?
• Appendix C: What Is Asperger's Syndrome?

Bibliography and Resources.

Index.